Intro

Another week, another #hopework assignment.

You will need 15 minutes and something to capture your thoughts to complete this assignment.This assignment touches on the tender subject of family. #hopework #HopeworkSet3

We want to know where we come from. Who came before us? Who are our ancestors? What are our stories?

The popularity of DNA testing kits and PBS’ Finding Your Roots speaks to our need for connection to where we’ve come from. The beginning of (re)connecting to our people begins with knowing our parents and grandparents. This is true whether you grew up with adoptive, bio, foster, or chosen family. If you were stolen from your people, choose Option C in Step 3 below.

Read through this exercise before doing it. If your experience differs from what is offered in Option A, use Option B.

There is no threaded version of this exercise, but there is a series of Bluesky posts.

Step-by-step

1) Find a comfortable and safe place to write.

2) Choose Option A or B to complete:

Option A

For many of us, our primary parent was a (step)mother. For others, it was a (step)father. Or a grandparent, or a foster parent, or someone else. Perhaps your primary parent used a different name for who they are to you. Set a 5 minute timer and write about your primary parent and what gifts they shared with you and what burdens fell to you from them.

Who are your primary parent’s parents? What did they have to share with you? What are their family names? If one or both of the names changed with marriage or partnership, what family name were they born into?

Where did you and your family members grow up? Where did they live?

Stop writing once the timer goes off. After the exercise, feel free to come back and write some more if you want.

Now turn to your secondary parent. Set a 5 minute timer and write about your secondary parent and what gifts they shared with you and what burdens fell to you from them.

Who are your secondary parent’s parents? What did they have to share with you? What are their family names? If one or both of the names changed with marriage or partnership, what family name were they born into?

Stop writing once the timer goes off. After the exercise, feel free to come back and write some more if you want.

Finally, turn to where you were born and where you grew up. Where were you born? Where did you grow up? What connects you to that place? What disconnects you from it?

Option B

Does your experience fall outside of what’s offered in Option A? Set an 8 minute timer and write about the gifts and burdens of your experience and the people who were a part of it by their presence and/or absence.

Stop writing once the timer goes off. After the exercise, feel free to come back and write some more if you want.

Now turn to the place(s) you grew up. Set a 7 minute timer and write about the place(s) where you grew up. Where did you grow up? What connects you to that place? What disconnects you from it? What else do you know about places you are connected to?

Stop writing once the timer goes off. After the exercise, feel free to come back and write some more if you want.

3) Option C

For those of us who have been stolen from our land and our people, you have a different assignment this week. Know that your ancestors know who you are. Your ancestors know who you are and you can talk to them. During these 15 minutes, invite your wise ancestors close and take the time to write a letter to them: What would you want them to know about you? What do you want to know about them?

4) Optional

After your 15 minutes of writing are over, feel free to read what you wrote and add to it if you feel moved to do so.

Our fourth week will take place on zoom. Info and registration.